Things were really progressing far to quickly, and although I’m exhausted, I will have to try to put an order into all the events. It is also because it gives a different light even on what you were doing, when you arrive somewhere.

I will just take the WordPress affair, because the very process should be enlightening enough for many other things, some hidden in the unconscious, some I was working at much more consciously.

Through which very personal affairs I landed in this little town of Cuenca, is maybe not of importance. The question is that I liked it and decided to tray staying, even if things were really becoming difficult. I was running out of everything, if seen from the material point of view, had somehow the feeling to play the role of the robbed man helped by the Samaritan, though without Samaritan to be found anywhere, but feeling inside of me regaining strength and forces and increasing vitality. I was full of joy walking around Cuenca’s streets and among the old buildings and churches, happy to have escaped the ill wet weather of Guayaquil. As I couldn’t dispose of my computer anymore (hit by a strong virus attack whose antivirus had not yet been found), I used to work in internet cafés, specially in the Lai Ming where I found a most agreable surrounding atmosphere, which helped me through extremely difficult matters. In order to keep my work, I used to send an e-mail to myself with the new document as attachement. Whenever though I wanted to work again on the same text, or on several together, the finding and searching and opening became unbearable. When Mareike Sievers told me thus she had a …. in internet where she wrote about her experiences on the trip, I asked her to send me the adress, and she did. I have to admit that I was marvelled at first glance by the esthetics and started imediately fumbling around in order to open one.

Whenever my somewhat slow mind gets confronted to something new, it does always the same. It takes the more important elements needed in order to make it work, and leave the rest for much later. I thus learned ‘post’ and ‘manage’ and ‘presentation’ almost immediately, although I needed a certain time in order to make te difference between ‘edit’ and ‘publish’, until I finally understood that there was no page without ‘publishing’.

Again, my mind needed to adapt eyes and concentration and organization on the very presentation of the place where you are supposed to write into, as it tends to concentrate itself only in a given usual context, which for me was a Word Document. Consequently I could not think myself writing in a different context and thought first of all, simply, to use the whole in order to keep my texts. I scotched thus whole chapters of my works in ‘posts’ with disastruous results, until I discovered that there were pages, too. The whole work scotching and patching was making me familiar with the environment, and the more time passed, the more I was enchanted by the sole perspective of putting such an order into all my pages and chapters. After having solved this way the problem of organization I started worrying about esthetics: adequate to what would be what inside of the limited offer? (Which I thought quite large on the other hand.) I spent hours waiting for the skins to open, remarked that some worked this way, the others that way, some had pages, some not, and tried to make fit not only the image to the text, but even the whole functioning of the page into a given metaphysical frame.

Already more than ten days had passed, where enchanted I had spent my hours without creating anything but an outer harmony that would build a quiet environment where I could work in calm, when I started scotching the texts written in the internet café, which, thus ordered, seem to present a certain inner logic which inspired quite a lot of other texts. At that time, I hadn’t yet discovered stats nor even tags. I was just in some kind of happy concentration due to the extremely agreable esthetics resulting from that kind of interaction. I was managing to become quicker, to solve difficult problems linked to the almost impossibility to present poems in an agreable way (Catalina Sojo’s page), and played with different skins in order to see which pleased me most. I also solved the problem of chapter’s titles, whether they were not too long, too obvious, not in the right order. As pages seemed to work exactly in the contrary direction than posts, I started thinking in both logics (one to keep, one to show) at the same time.

Finally I managed to get a job. Although I continued working on ‘clearing up refracted lines’ I started to realize that I was becoming horribly tired. I proposed director Salazar her page at the same time I was thinking about a new for myself. Most enchanted with the acid humour deriving from texts on the blog, feeling that even esthetics were kept inside of the same spirit, to say it somehow, as if it were not allowed to go beyond a certain number of highly strict ethical rules, thus never becoming vulgar, but without the too pompous  dignified air of those who pretend to ethics without really believing in them.

This environment seemed to me extremely relaxing and easier to go along with my 7 to 10 hours job I had on the other side, and thus I tried to put all my extremely serious and abstract and metaphysical and everything ideas into exactly that very context (which, on the other hand, provoked the extreme pleasure of reminding me of my conversations with Hannah.) Which meant, less concept and more image. Fascinated with the challenge, I started writing …. something, hoping the context would help. At the same time, I work on Salazar’s page. Another interesting challenge.

I suppose that we work with inner logics that reveal themselves whenever we are working at something more material, thing I had not really done before, as I was more used to the immediate intuitive dealing with high pressure situations that had to be solved by immediate action, and almost without plan nor order nor organization. As it was coming. For a long time I had thus dreamt with the possibility of showing the inner logic through an organized integration of a ’something’ into a determined social environment, thing which failed in first attempt in France 2003/4, working already on esthetics as vehicle of ethical or even moral value and consequently of inner organization allowing integration of marginal populations into a general compound. Very deceived, I decided to leave Europe.

As integration in Ecuador was horribly difficult, as I didn’t understand absolutely anything of the organization, I was trying to understand how my logic could be inserted into the given undetermined whole. As it didn’t seem to provoke excessive catastrophes (one or two, but this seemed irrelevant to me all in all), I started to search for means to express the inner functioning of myself almost unconsciously, like someone who dreams looking out of the window or just because he hasn’t anything to do.

When Salazar, quite happy with her page, said that day, that it should appear in Google, as if it were the dream of her life to see her school appearing in Google, I thought the proposal extremely provocative, as I remembered to have broken the Google logic years before, around 2002, as a shere logical problem deriving from the organization of the received information and criteria of selection. A problem we had been talking about at University, and which seem to me to show failures somewhere, without me having the elements to know exactly where. I thus kept the problem somewhere in the hidden unconscious, and it was by breaking error of symbolic logic around 1999, that I acquired the volume of theoretical thought that allowed easily to deal with the Google logic. But I had just treated it as a hobby, in theoretical areas, and I was all of a sudden horribly curious to know whether it would work in practice.

Logic is never alone, it is a whole philosophy. Sorbonne usually quite reserved and distant morals seemed completely incompatible with a somewhat always the best searching Google logic. Thus I asked for help to University mate Anne Hèléne Nicolas, (not to herself but to the memory of the way of thinking and organizing reality) as she had gone to Ecole Normale, the snobby state subventioned University of France where even … boasting is allowed. I couldn’t do with Normale people, but this one, coming from an extremely conservative Nantes family context, smashed against extreme lefty pretentious nationalism, had composed some kind of  neither betraying this nor that, while probably betraying both,which had fascinated my intelligence, and who seemed to me the only way to match Google logic.

As I had opened thus two different blog compounds through two different e-mail adresses, I kept nourishing with my distant admiration blog one, knowing that self reference which was not detected as such, did impress positively the machine. (Never mind the boasting, internal criteria are extremely hard.) At that moment Ms Salazar made me aware ot the existence of stats and tags, which concentrated my whole admiration for quite a lot of time, while continuing to work on filling Google’s belly with the most incredible amount of information of the most diverse fields. I was starting though to feel alone, and I started joggling with tags (I didn’t know to exist), sending very careful messages here and there, or not that careful messages at all, knowing that my usually quite determined way of saying does disturb people and does make communication not very easy. As nothing terrible seemed to happen, I open the second of blog 2, which is born at the same time from a desire to get out of my frozen inner cyberspace, but also, from the intuitive apprehension that links must help the way up. Again, intelligently (I must say in Google language) links are not put in the ‘links’ shelf but directly on the page. Google can’t know how much it is mine for myself, and seems to count these links as extremely positive interventions.

Now I know almost everything: I have been through presentation, know there are upgrades, deal with the managing quite well, with possible errors and weaknesses, options are explored, tags gone through and stats studied on every days basis.

I think the run towards fame and glory starts with a strange encounter with a blog on top ten. The esthetics transmitted some kind of terrible excitement, the kind of someone who jumps around in a football match when his team his winning, and shouts and yells and cries when he is loosing, and I found it so fascinating that I thought of transcribing it into a process of learning (here: of cracking logics). My usually quite sober texts did thus become touched by the attempt of putting all this excitement into a let us say, intellectual environment. I got so much into the game, that (well, I didn’t jump) I couldn’t almost sleep, although I knew that the chances of success very extremely slight.

Putting seven ideas written down on the day’s page that day into realization, I was at the same time working at three or four other ideas, as changing internet café, using machines that had a different hour, so as to give the impression that there were hundreds and hundreds of people researching my name all over the world. I think to have cracked the system of Friday. The two adresses. Thus, while stupidly putting my name under all my texts, and I new it would never work, I present my former works with ‘all rights reserved’ and extremely simple and finally adequate presentation after so much work (hundreds and hundreds of hours: I liked the idea with the disordered numbers so very much), and my very sober name. And do the same on two other pages with another e-mail adress, Salazar’s and Sojos’. That day, one day after I had done that, I knew that it was done, and write: I just have to wait for results. And indeed, two days after Google spits out my name four or five time all together.

Now, how are my little interventions, repetition of name and so on, of help in the general organization of the strategy with the two adresses? How do my studies contribute decisevily to my indeniable success? Google likes scientifical staff: he adores the article on halotane with a chemical formula and great lots of deep observations, and logically likes stats, too. Copied stats from WordPress must refer to main blocks of statistical references inside of his belly. Again another patched bit on an enormous mountain. The little very varied information does scotch on whole mountains of extremely important information, in his understanding. Double and triple meaning does link information in possibilities to twice or three times and up to seven times possible fields of application of meaning, consequently for him, I look something like the Encyclopaedia Britannica or … even worse!

Don’t ever think these things may happen, accidentally … Accident helps only when there is a very powerful logic behind!